Rick Perry: “No to ObamaCare; Yes to Zombies!”

In what some are considering a controversial but potentially business savvy move, Rick Perry has announced that Texas will not be participating in Obamacare but will instead hire Detroit’s Marc Siwak to design and open a Zombie Theme Park in Texas.

Representatives from Texas DSHS (Department of State Health Services) stated that;

“From a fiscal standpoint opening a Zombie Theme Park is an excellent way of handling the sudden increase in the Zombie population we expect to see from not having Obamacare.”

Texas Department of Labor officials further added that;

“A chain of Zombie Theme Parks and a readily available supply of zombie workers? We’ve got a win-win scenario here.”


Governor Perry “Unruly worker? Remember the double tap rule!”

Governor Perry dismissed concerns about the viability of a Zombie workforce by stating;

“Without healthcare we expect a steady supply of workers to be provided as the Zombie Apocalypse takes place. Replacing zombies who fall apart due to decay should be relatively easy.”

To ensure a swift employee turnover process Governor Romney has proposed what is becoming known as;

“The Double Tap Bill”.

Voting on the legislation takes place early next week.

Supreme Court Uses Personhood to Give U.S. Dollar Bill the Right to Vote

In a controversial 5-4 decision the USSC passed a bill establishing that dollar bills are people and therefore should be given citizenship and the right to vote.

Justice Scalia wrote in his conclusion that;

“This legislation will set an important precedent on the status and voting rights of American money.”


Mitt Romney “This is an important day in American history!”

 

Mitt Romney praised the decision stating;

“This is an important day in American history!  I can only hope that this decision will help the other denominations get the recognition they deserve. I’ve spoken with quite a few 1,000 dollar bills who would love the right to vote!”

In a show of solidarity for the new voting rights of American currency Mitt Romney set out to successfully raise one hundred million dollars in one month.

Shortly after achieving the 100 million dollar goal an exuberant Mitt dismissed concerns expressed over the sudden influx of money citizens into a weak housing market by stating that;

“I’ve already spoken to a number of my friends at BP and OPEC and they’ve guaranteed that between us we can find homes for every money-person in America. “

Romney staff confirmed that Mitt had already taken steps on the matter by renting a larger vault space at Bank of America.

TAM, Sexual Harassment, PZMyers, Thunderf00t and freethoughtblogs OH MY!

I’ve watched the argument over sexual harassment evolve over the past week or two and while I can’t really comment on the atmosphere of the skeptic conventions (they’re cost prohibitive so I don’t attend them) I have attended other conventions in the past so I’m familiar with the overall atmosphere.

And before anyone dismisses the convention scene as unimportant I’ll point out that networking in person can be incredibly useful, especially to people whose skills are suited to in-person communication. Convention networking is like any skill set (you know how to do it properly and it’s very useful; you don’t know how and the value of attending a convention is decreased).

So resolving the issue of sexual harassment at conventions and whether it is problematic is necessary.

Aside from anything else? From a strict, marketing perspective; if there is a perceived problem in some area and it impacts on sales then you’ve got a legitimate problem.

I’m told that there is a 22% drop in the number of female attendees at TAM this year and there is no arguing with that number; yes. You’ve got a problem.

If you’re getting similar numbers at other conventions then sexual harassment has become an issue at these conventions-not just at TAM because generally these kinds of drops in attendance are an indicator there’s something wrong with what you’re selling. Continue reading

Rupert Murdoch Praises Scientology for being Weird and Creepy

Media Mogul Rupert Murdoch, founder of the News Corporation made headlines in newspapers today by tweeting an apparent attack against Scientology.

News Organizations reacted swiftly to his description of Scientology as;

“Something creepy, maybe even evil, about these people.”

Rupert Murdoch  “Something creepy, maybe even evil, about these people.”

When asked for further comment Mr. Murdoch’s staff clarified his position by saying;

Mr. Murdoch did not view his words as an attack. They were meant as a compliment. Mr Murdoch has worked for almost two decades at building NewsCorp into one of the wealthiest, creepiest, evil organizations in the world.

Mr. Murdoch confirmed that his words were meant as praise with further tweets where he complimented Scientology for being;

“Very weird, but big, big money involved with Tom Cruise either number two or three in hierarchy,” ”

He also acknowledged actor Tom Cruise for his work advancing Scientology commenting further that;

“Mr. Cruise has done excellent work in the field of weird, creepy cult like behavior. I’m amazed he’s still only number two or three in the hierarchy. If Scientology won’t recognize his efforts and reward him appropriately we at the News Corporation would be only too happy to have him on board.”

P. Rose

Follow me at;
http://www.youtube.com/user/TheTruePooka
https://twitter.com/#!/TheTruePooka
http://www.facebook.com/thetruepooka

Rupert Murdoch Praises Scientology for being Weird and Creepy

Media Mogul Rupert Murdoch, founder of the News Corporation made headlines in newspapers today by tweeting an apparent attack against Scientology.

News Organizations reacted swiftly to his description of Scientology as;

“Something creepy, maybe even evil, about these people.”

Rupert Murdoch  “Something creepy, maybe even evil, about these people.”

When asked for further comment Mr. Murdoch’s staff clarified his position by saying;

Mr. Murdoch did not view his words as an attack. They were meant as a compliment. Mr Murdoch has worked for almost two decades at building NewsCorp into one of the wealthiest, creepiest, evil organizations in the world.

Mr. Murdoch confirmed that his words were meant as praise with further tweets where he complimented Scientology for being;

“Very weird, but big, big money involved with Tom Cruise either number two or three in hierarchy,” ”

He also acknowledged actor Tom Cruise for his work advancing Scientology commenting further that;

“Mr. Cruise has done excellent work in the field of weird, creepy cult like behavior. I’m amazed he’s still only number two or three in the hierarchy. If Scientology won’t recognize his efforts and reward him appropriately we at the News Corporation would be only too happy to have him on board.”

P. Rose

Follow me at;
http://www.youtube.com/user/TheTruePooka
https://twitter.com/#!/TheTruePooka
http://www.facebook.com/thetruepooka